Recognizing and Understanding Coercive Control in Relationships

Understanding Coercive Control in Relationships

Coercive control is a form of ongoing psychological and emotional abuse that is characterized by manipulation, control, and oppression. This form of abuse is often associated with narcissistic behaviors and can limit a person’s autonomy, use technology to track them, use intimacy and sex as a means of exerting power or control, and monitor the victim’s health and body.

Coercive control is typically based on a pattern of intermittent reinforcement, an approach where the abuser alternates between kindness and abuse. This tactic can have a significant impact on the victim’s self-esteem and self-worth, leaving them feeling confused and trapped within the relationship. An example of this could be a partner who showers their significant other with love and affection one day, and then berates and belittles them the next.

Recognizing Coercive Control Tactics

Coercive control tactics can range from subtle to overtly abusive behaviors. These include insults, manipulation, and intimidation [2]. For instance, a partner may constantly belittle another’s appearance or achievements, subtly chipping away at their self-esteem.

Other examples of coercive control tactics include emotional abuse, using harm to steer the victim’s thoughts, feelings, and actions, and even the potential involvement of physical force in intimate partner settings. Power dynamics play a crucial role in coercive control, as the abuser seeks to limit the victim’s autonomy and uses various tactics to exert control over them.

Effects of Coercive Control on Victims

Victims of coercive control often experience a significant negative impact on their self-esteem and self-worth. This continuous psychological and emotional abuse can lead to the formation of traumatic bonds based on intermittent reinforcement, making it difficult for victims to leave the relationship.

Leaving a relationship involving coercive control can be challenging, especially if the victim’s self-esteem and self-worth have been negatively affected. For instance, a victim may be manipulated into thinking they cannot survive without their abuser, making the prospect of leaving terrifying and seemingly impossible.

Signs of Coercive Control in Relationships

Signs of coercive control in relationships can be subtle and insidious. They include isolation from support systems, denial of freedom and autonomy, gaslighting, and name-calling [3]. Additional signs encompass reinforcing traditional gender roles, turning children against the victim, controlling aspects of the victim’s health and body, making jealous accusations, and regulating the sexual relationship.

Recognizing these signs is crucial for individuals to identify and seek help when experiencing such behaviors in their relationships [2,3]. For example, if a partner is consistently making false accusations of infidelity, it could be a sign of coercive control.

Resources and Support for Victims of Coercive Control

Resources are available for those experiencing coercive control. The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers free, confidential, 24/7 support for individuals experiencing domestic violence. Services provided include identifying abuse, creating a safety plan, supporting others, and offering local resources.

Additional resources are available for both survivors and those wanting to support survivors, including information on safety plans, internet safety, supporting children, and pet safety. It is important for individuals experiencing coercive control to maintain communication with support systems and seek help from organizations such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline [3,4].

Coping and Seeking Help

Safely leaving a relationship involving coercive control can be complex. However, having a safety plan in place and seeking professional support from psychologists trained in abusive relationships and relational trauma can be helpful [1,3].

While coercive control is illegal in some countries, it is not yet illegal in the United States unless a crime has been committed, which complicates matters when seeking legal recourse.

Regardless, individuals experiencing coercive control should be encouraged to utilize resources such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline and other support services to cope with and seek help for their situation [3,4]. For example, a victim could reach out to the hotline to create a safety plan and learn about local resources.